James Dean

I look like James Dean, not like he is now... all skin and bones, but more like when he was in the prime of his life. I am kind of a chick magnet, I pull all the bum-wiggling krumpers from down south side. Big ups to my ho's from SA, stay clean!!

I thought that I looked like Uncle Jason but I saw him recently and he looked a bit scary, kind of like a screwed up Frankenstein. Jog it off big fella, we all have falls now and then but you don't see it effecting my beauty.

The Smarmy Swarmy

Mmm Zebra

Mum & Dad left me all alone the other day. They went out shopping and made me fend for myself.

I was getting a little peckish when I looked outside and noticed a Zebra walking past. As most of you would know Zebra meat is tastier than banana custard so I whipped out to the shed and grabbed my spear.

I crept up behind the striped equine and launched myself towards its head. The Zebra heard my screams of "da da da da da da" just before I sunk the spear deep into its throat.

I will spare you the gory details of how I skinned, gutted and cured the foolish animal, needless to say I do love the smell of animal blood in the morning.

I prepared the meat in a white wine sauce and served it up on a garlic potato mash. What you see in the picture above is me just finishing off the last bite or two.

I have my eyes on that lazy good for nothing cat next. Be warned Mongi the "sha" is on the loose.

Bye

Admire my beauty

I call this picture "The Life of an Asher". All I seem to do is lie around on my fat tummy looking for carpet to lick.

I have been approached to be a male model. I had to decline as my package was too big for the undie shots. I haven't been up to much recently, just lying around waiting for stuff to happen. I have managed to roll a couple of times but in my mind it is over-rated.

I also reckon teeth are over-rated so I am refusing to grow any.

I did manage to catch the cat's tail the other day. That was fun, I giggled my nappy off. Apparently it was not so funny for the cat.

I don't have too much else to say apart from eesay oserlays..... thats pig latin.